I see in SO many forums, dating blogs and facebook groups, guys that are asking for advice with their Tinder Profile pictures.
And most of the advice is absolutely horrible! I even see professional photographers offering to take “high quality” pictures that are supposed to get the guy more dates.
The “quality” of the photo has ZERO to do with how ATTRACTIVE the picture is.
I have worked with and have been a part of many dating “bootcamps” and dating workshops. Many of these workshops had a service where a photographer would take a nice photo with a good camera and a high quality lens. But the only problem with this is that ALL of the photos look staged and posed, this is NOT attractive.
Although the quality of the photos looks good to a photographer it looks super try-hard to a potential date. And therefore it is not attractive and shes not swiping right.
Now lets looks at an example of a POSED tinder profile picture…
As you can see, the picture is a quality photo. He is also well dressed and looks like a nice guy. But, does it look attractive? Is the photo masculine? NO
It looks like it should be for a high school yearbook, and that’s not really the look that you’re aiming for with a tinder pic. With any online dating app profile picture, you want to show masculinity. you want to show a confident, attractive, alpha man.
You want your pictures to be a little mysterious. You want the girl thats looking at your photos to think, “hmm whats going on here.” Its a little mysterious and you have quaetions in your head about it. Compared that to THIS photo above and you have ALL the answers i.e he asked a photographer to take a picture, he sat in the grass and had a picture taken. No that interesting (I will show you some better examples in a second)
Now lets take a look another “problem”picture. This is another mistake that guys make. They read on dating sites that its “high value” to have friends so they think, “hmm let me get some friends in my pictures.”
Now whats wrong with this picture? Maybe its mysterious but NOT in a good way. It doesn’t look attractive OR interesting at all. This should NEVER be used for a dating profile.
When the picture is cool or attractive you can almost feel it. Sometimes you don’t know why but you just think to yourself, “that guy looks cool.” And its not a looks thing either. Even if a guy is attractive he can have unattractive posed pictures. The only time to take posed pictures is if you’re actually a model. And girls will mention that when they message you.
I have done a few photo shoots and girls will always say, “are you a model?” If you can pull off the “model” look then it’s not the end of the world but when I used posed photos I would ALWAYS get messages like, “did you do a photo shoot for bumble?” And after awhile these messages can get annoying. But my reply to this was always, “I put all of my bathroom selfies on tinder.” and the girls usually laughed.
Here is one of my “posed” pictures….
This picture is a better posed picture as I am not looking at the camera. But if I was smiling a little and the picture looked more “natural” and less posed then it would be better for tinder
So, how can you take pictures that don’t look posed or try-hard?
Well here are a couple of “rules” that I came up with:
- Don’ look directly at the camera
- Do some type of activity or action and have the photo taken (cook something on the grill, laugh, walk, any type of movement or small action)
- Do not freeze into a position and have a picture taken (always move or change positions)
- Use props in the photo (a hat, sunglasses, skateboard, football, bag, etc)
- Candid photos are best
Candid photos are best but not always possible. SO you need to force candid photos. You need to plan to take photos that look natural and like they just happened, they weren’t planned.
Here is an example of a candid photo of mine that works really well…
I didn’t know that my photo was being taken so it is a more natural reaction. It also provides that “mystery” that I was talking about earlier. You think to yourself when looking at the picture, “what is going on here?” “who is this guy, what is he doing, why did someone take a picture of him?” When are girl is thinking all of these things, it is building value and attraction.
Lets look at one more photo mistake that guys make…
Although the mountains look cool the way that the guy is standing is to stiff and boring. In this case the guy should be acting excited or happy to be at such a cool place AND to look like hes having fun. The photo “quality” is good however the photo “attractiveness” is horrible. Now, if you’re showing this picture to you mom or friends on facebook then yes its completely fine. But if you want girls to see this and become attracted to you then you have some work to do.
ALMOST DONE….. 😉